What's On in Glasgow: Cinema
Film Reviews - Christina's Crits:
Christina Byrne (Jim's mother) - published poet, writer and film critique, puts her observational and writing talents to use reviewing films for the website. Looks like we are a dynasty!
Latest Crits
August, 2010
Rebound (15)
Catherine Zeta-Jones is Sandy a newly divorced mother of two. She has been out of the job market for years but finds herself a job in a TV Sports Channel Company. In need of a babysitter she takes on 25 year old Aram who is separated from his French wife but so soft-hearted he will not divorce her because she will lose her green card. Aram eventually takes on the role of full-time nanny to Sandy's children. The 'humour' is milked to excess, with every likely and unlikely scenario imaginable.
Romance blossoms between him and 40 year-old Sandy but she ends the affair because of the age difference. Aram goes off on a trip around the world and returns several years later all grown up.
What happens then? Well, like the rest of the film the story is predictable.
Zeta-Jones is plausible as the divorcee, newly freed from the restrictions of her domineering philandering husband, yet not quite into the dating scene. She obviously has nothing in common with Aram's goofy friends and he is subjected to ribbing and ridicule from her work colleagues so the romance seems doomed from the outset. One big advantage is that her two obnoxious brats actually like him because he acts like a child himself.
Director Bart Freundlich is also the writer of the film so blame him for the juvenile jokes and situations.
Knight and Day (12A)
Having seen the trailer for this film, I was looking forward to it and am glad to say I was not disappointed.
Roy Miller (Tom Cruise) is entrusted with a valuable new invention and the safety of the inventor. In the airport he 'accidentally' bumps into June Haver (Cameron Diaz) on her way to be bridesmaid at her sister's wedding. Initially June is told that the plane is full and she will need to catch a later flight but then a seat becomes available. By the time the plane makes a crash landing Roy has dispatched the pilot and all the passengers. He tells her he is an F B I agent who has been betrayed by his partner and is now being hunted down. For her own safety she is forced to stay with him
High speed car chases, daredevil stunts, good fun and edge of seat drama keep you hooked as the daring duo seek to elude government bad guys, with the action moving to a remote island, to Austria and to Spain where Knight and Day are caught up in a motor bike in the middle of the bull-run.
The plot takes a twist and for a while it is unclear who the goodies are but it is all finally ironed out.
June, 2010
Robin Hood (12a)
Robin Longstride (Russell Crowe) has spent 10 years fighting in the Crusades with King Richard, and the army is now on its way home. In a final battle to capture a French castle the king is killed. His friend, Robert Loxley, is taking the royal crown to England where the king's brother John is now the ruler. Loxley is ambushed by traitor Sir Godfrey but Robin arrives to save the day -- and the crown. He promises the dying Loxley that he will return the man's sword to his father and when he gets to Nottingham, Loxley senior persuades him to take the place of his son, with the son's wife Lady Marion (Cate Blanchette) thrown in as a bonus. Robin is no longer a lowly archer but a knight of the realm.
Meanwhile back in London the new king is imposing crippling taxes on his subjects with Sir Godfrey, his long time friend put in charge of collecting them. This brings the country to the brink of civil war and it is only united by the threat of an invasion by the King of France. During the fighting in shallow water near what looks like the white cliffs of Dover, Robin has his final battle with Godfrey and manages to save Marion from drowning. (Why was she there? I don't know.)
Instead of being grateful, King John outlaws Robin so no doubt director Ridley Scott's next movie will be full of the exploits of Robin Hood and his merry men, outwitting the law in Sherwood Forest.
Having been brought up on the light-hearted legends of the folk hero who robbed the rich to help the poor, ROBIN HOOD is not what I expected. It's not exactly history and all the battle scenes make it a bit grim -- tedious as well as they seem to go on and on -- and on. It is also hard to keep track of who is who.
However Russell Crowe is convincing in his role and Cate Blanchette makes a spirited Maid Marion. Oscar Isaacs plays King John with just the right amount of arrogance and Mark Strong is superb as his pal, the evil Sir Godfrey, his performance reminding me of childhood pantomimes. I could hardly keep myself from hissing every time he appeared on screen. So I did enjoy the film even if not for the right reasons.
Cop Out (15
)Jimmy is a cop in NYPD. He needs money to pay for his daughter's wedding but his interference in an undercover operation sees him suspended from duty without pay. However, he owns a rare baseball card that is worth thousands of dollars. Trouble starts when he is selling the card and the shop is robbed, the robbers taking the precious card. It goes from the original thief to a ruthless Mexican gangster and drug dealer.
The rest of the film deals with Jimmy's efforts to retrieve the card, helped by his sidekick Paul who has his own problems. He thinks his wife is cheating on him.
Bruce Willis plays Jimmy, playing Bruce Willis. Paul is played by Tracy Morgan, supposedly a funny guy whose jokes you can see coming a mile away.
The film is a send-up of all the other cop movies and is nowhere near as funny as it is billed but you might enjoy it.
The director is Kevin Smith.
Sex and the City 2 (15)
Time has moved on and Carrie and her friends are beginning to feel their ages especially Samantha (Kim Cattrall) who is going through the menopause and is like a walking chemist shop with her cache of vitamin pills and hormone creams.
Carrie and Mr. Big have settled into a routine of nights in front of the box, Charlotte (Kristin Davis) is overwhelmed with domesticity and the tantrums of her two little girls and Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) is frustrated by the attitude of her boss.
When Samantha meets a Middle Eastern millionaire who invites the four girls to spend a few days at one of his hotels in Abu Dhabi, they jump at the chance. Whilst there Carrie meets an old flame and temptation beckons.
First class travel, luxurious living, designer fashions, what else is there to life? Nothing much and that is the plot of the movie. It runs for 2 1/2 hours and it is 2 hours too long.
There is the odd humorous one liner that evokes a snigger, (after all the title does tell us the emphasis is obviously on sex) but in the main, the mood of the filmgoers at the showing I attended appeared to be boredom.
Sorry, Mr. Director Michael Patrick King, I did not like your film.
Review: Crazy Heart Pat Byrne, February, 2010
3rd June, 2009
Angels and Demons (12a)
Tom Hanks returns as Robert Langdon in this thriller, based in Dan Brown's successful novel. Whilst not exactly a prequel, Angels and Demons was written before the Da Vinci Code and the story follows a similar theme - the Catholic Church's struggle with forces out to destroy it.
A secret sect known as the Illuminati, dating back four centuries, returns to threaten the Church. The Illuminati had first made its appearance when men of science began to question traditional beliefs.
A pope has died and the cardinals gather in Rome to elect his successor. At the same time a powerful, highly explosive substance called 'antimatter' has been harvested from the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland. This time bomb is stolen and used to threaten the cardinals and the Vatican itself.
The film follows Langdon and scientist Vittoria Vetra in their search for this substance before it detonates and destroys the Vatican.
Fast-paced action, and breathtaking hot wheels car dashes take the audience around Vatican City as Langdon deciphers the clues that will lead him to the bomb, with hordes of dead bodies left in his wake at every church and crypt he locates.
If you have read the book you might be disappointed in director Ron Howard's film. Although there appears to be a lot happening I found it 'thin' in places.
12 Rounds (12a)
Detective Danny Fisher (John Cena) arrests dangerous criminal Miles Jackson (Aidan Gillen.) but during the arrest his girlfriend is accidentally killed. A year later Jackson breaks out of prison vowing revenge on the cop he sees as responsible for her death. He kidnaps Fisher's girlfriend, Molly. Fisher has then to complete 12 tasks or she will be killed.
We tag along with the detective as he deciphers the clues but he is always one step behind the criminal, although he survives each 'round.'
A runaway tram scenario has echoes of the film 'Speed' - in fact the whole movie is a mishmash of everything that has been done before in every cop show and thriller that has come out of Hollywood. There is action aplenty but most of it is predictable and the ending is just too convenient. Amongst his girlfriend's many talents is the ability to pilot the helicopter in which the villain attempts to make his escape. Well, it is only a story.
The film is directed by Renny Harlin and also stars Ashley Scott as Molly. If you are at a loose end it might be worth seeing but don't worry if you miss it.
18th May, 2009
State of Play (12a)
A young female researcher apparently commits suicide in a subway station. A junkie is murdered. The two deaths seem unconnected but when Washington Globe reporter, Cal McAffrey, (Russell Crowe) covers the story, connections begin to emerge. The researcher had been working on behalf of politician, Stephen Collins, (Ben Affleck) a college friend of McAffrey's and had uncovered suspicious information regarding an international security firm employed by the US Government. She had also been having an affair with married Collins.
Russell Crowe plays McAffrey as the stereotypical old-fashioned hack, grinding out his copy on a sixteen-year-old computer. By contrast young blogger, Della Frye, has the latest technology for her hourly ‘reports.' When the Globe's chief editor (Helen Mirren) sends the unlikely duo to cover the same story they unearth a web of corruption and conspiracy.
Throw in a previous romance between McAffrey and Collins' wife, a disillusioned former soldier and the financial troubles of the newspaper and you have a mix that gives the audience intrigue, fast-paced action and edge-of-seat drama. State of Play is adapted from a 6-part 2003 BBC series and perhaps suffers from trying to cram everything into two hours but despite that, director Kevin Mcdonald's movie is well worth seeing.
Cheri (15)
Michelle Pfeiffer plays Lea, a high-class Parisian prostitute numbering royalty amongst her lovers. Having reached ‘a certain age' she feels it is time she retired from the profession to enjoy her wealth but Charlotte, one of her former ‘colleagues' wants her to take on a final client – her 19-year-old son Cheri (Rupert Friend.)
Lea and Cheri fall in love and live in idyllic bliss at Lea's home for six years before Charlotte decides it is time her son married and provided her with grandchildren. Cheri thinks that he and Lea will continue to be lovers but Lea decides she must give up her young paramour. What she ever saw in him in the first place is a mystery to me.
Really, the best things about this film are the elaborate sets with Art Noveau décor and the sumptuous fashions of the early twentieth century. Apart from that, it drags and is one long yawn from start to finish with endless scenes of the lovers in and out of bed.
Sadly, director Stephen Frears' movie bored me rigid.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (15)
O K the title is intriguing, conjuring up images of a Dickens' novel but there
is no chance that the film will captivate you in the same way. Connor Mead (Matthew McConaughey) is a photographer and a confirmed womaniser who loves them and leaves them without thought. Invited to be best man at his brother's wedding, he gets drunk and almost ruins it for his brother and fiancée, to the extent that she threatens to cancel the whole thing. The ghost of Uncle Wayne (Michael Douglas) appears to him and tries to convince him of the error of his lifestyle. Two of his former girlfriends also materialize with the same message.
Billed as a comedy/romance, there is little of either in director Mark Water's film but judge for yourself if you have nothing better to do. However, don't worry if you miss it.
13th April, 2009
Gran Torino (15)
Walt Kowalski (Clint Eastwood) lives in Detroit and has spent his life in the car industry. His prized possession is a hand-built car that he spends his days lovingly polishing.
When the film opens his wife has died and the family is assembled for the funeral. Walt looks on with disapproval as his granddaughter arrives in church dressed in a skimpy top and bare midriff and spends her time texting her friends. At the reception afterwards it is plain that Walt's relationship with his two sons is uncomfortable and he cannot wait for them to go. Their only interest in him seems to be to sell his house and get him into a retirement home.
The district has become run down, many of his former neighbours have moved out and his new neighbours are mainly immigrant families. The people next door are a Hmong family and he regards them with hostility, having spent the Vietnam war killing what he calls 'chinks'
In a initiation task for membership of the local gang, the son of the family is charged with stealing Walt's precious Gran Torino but Walt disturbs him and warns him off. To make amends, the family insists the boy does work for Walt and their friendship develops. When the gang attacks the boy's sister, Walt decides it is payback time.
Apparently this is our last chance to see Clint Eastwood on film since his decision to step back from acting. His portrayal of the surly, racist war veteran is spot on but at the same time evokes sympathy for a man whose world has changed beyond recognition. Throw in the surprising amount of humour and I guarantee you will enjoy this excellent movie that is both directed and produced by the star.
The Boat that Rocked (15)
Britain was awash with pop music in 1966 but the national radio station only broadcast a few hours of pop a week. There was no commercial radio and several pirate radio stations were set up offshore to cater for the pop market. Its DJs' presentations were less formal than the BBC's and the programmes attracted an estimated 14,000,000 listeners. THE BOAT THAT ROCKED is purported to be loosely based on Radio Caroline, one of the pirate stations.
The story involves Carl (Tom Sturridge,) expelled from his exclusive school for smoking dope. His mother (Emma Thomson) sends him to his godfather Quentin (Bill Nighy) who runs the ship and the radio station.
A Government minister (Kenneth Brannagh) is ordered to stop the pirate ships operating and tries several strategies before coming up with the Marine Broadcasting Act that made offshore stations illegal.
Billed as a comedy, there were certainly some laughs in the movie but few appealed to my sense of humour. The plot was not joined up, most of the performances were stereotypical and the two hours of running time seemed much, much longer. Long hair and short skirts abounded, nudity seemed obligatory and the whole thing appeared to be for the entertainment of the actors.
Despite enjoying the music, Richard Curtis' film failed to rock me.
31st March, 2009
Marley and Me (12a)
This is Owen Wilson as he has rarely been seen. Out goes the cooky, loud-mouthed slob and in comes the family man.
He plays journalist John Grogan, married to Jenny (Jennifer Aniston) in a feel-good story that features a dog that defies all efforts to train him into something like a loveable family pet. John has been prompted to get the dog when Jenny begins to talk about starting a family. He thinks the cute pup will take the place of a baby in the couple's life.
But even though Marley is loveable, he grows up to be anything but cute, ripping up and eating everything in sight including a gold necklace that John had bought for Jenny. As the years pass and the children come, the dog continues to wreak havoc but becomes part of the family.
John's newspaper column describing the antics of Marley is so popular that when he decides he wants to give it up to write on more serious topics, his editor (Alan Arkin) doubles his salary. Eventually the episodes are turned into the best-selling book that is the basis of the film.
Dog lovers will empathise with John and fall head over heels with director David Fankel's movie, other wise they will think it a load of mush. Take your pick.
Duplicity (12a)
Julie Roberts makes a welcome return to the screen as Claire, an ex CIA operative who works for a large corporation that manufactures toiletries. The firm is on the brink of revealing their latest product, an invention that will turn the industry on its head. Ray (Clive Owen) works for a rival company that is desperate to find out what the product is, obtain it and manufacture it. Claire and Ray had previously met when they worked as secret agents for their respective governments and a romance had developed between them. They decide that they will steal the formula for the new product, sell it to the highest bidder and retire on the proceeds but they are both so used to spying and subterfuge that neither can trust the other and the film is awash with double cross and double dealing.
Much of the story is told in flashback which can be confusing and the plot has more twists and turns than a satnav on speed. Be prepared to concentrate. However, you might find that it is not worthwhile and give up half way through, making the final twist (or double twist) in the tail a total surprise.
Director Tony Gilroy is perhaps trying to be too clever and runs the risk of losing the audience well before the end.
11th March, 2009.
The curious case of Benjamin Button (12a)
There has been so much hype surrounding the movie that no one can fail to know the 'plot.' Benjamin Button is born an old man and gets younger every year. When his mother dies giving birth to him, his father dumps him on the doorstep of an old people's home where he fits in really well when he is growing up. Initially wheelchair bound, he learns to walk, talk, read and write. Several years later he meets Daisy, the person that he says will have the biggest effect on his life.
From then on we are treated to almost every little incident in his mundane existence.
How many Baftas did the film get? Are the judges sure they weren't Daftas for it is the stupidest film I've seen in a long time - and it was a long time, almost three hours to be exact.
With Brad Pitt in the title role and Cate Blanchett playing Daisy, it would have seemed that Director David Finsher's film should have been a sure fire winner but it fell flat. Of the thirteen Oscar nominations it received, it was awarded three - for make-up, visual effects and art direction.
It is difficult to find words to describe the award-winning creation. Dull? Tedious? Boring? Take your pick.
The International
Clive Owen stars as Louis Salinger in this fast-paced thriller that is totally confusing right from reel one. Exciting it may be but forgive me if I lost the place more than once. Owens is an Interpol agent who is probing mysterious happening connected to a huge banking organization, the International Bank of Business and Credit (IBBC.)
Salinger's investigation develops into an obsession and when his partner dies in Berlin, (apparently of a heart attack) he suspects that he has been murdered. The partner had just been in contact with a witness who was prepared to give evidence against the bank. This witness is subsequently killed in a road accident and Salinger is ordered back to headquarters, leaving him more convinced of the power of the bank.
In today's climate of the shady dealings of international banks it is not too far-fetched to believe the scenario of them being involved in financing arms deals and plans for coups in developing countries and the film exploits this belief.
12th February, 2009.
Valkyrie (12a)
Tom Cruise stars as Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg in this story of a plot to kill Adolf Hitler. Disillusioned by Hitler's policies, the Colonel feels that the only answer is to get rid of the dictator and the Nazi party and install a new government. Many of the military leaders and some politicians were involved in the conspiracy that was only one of many attempts on the Fhrer's life. The plan was to take a bomb into the 'Wolf's Lair' where Hitler met with his colleagues to plan strategies of the war. After the assassination Operation Valkyrie was to be activated. This involved the calling in of another 'army' that Hitler had set up in Berlin.
Because of the large number of characters it's difficult to keep track of who is who and what side they are on. Like the 'Titanic' film, the audience know what the outcome of the plot will be so it is almost impossible for Director Bryan Singer to build up and keep the tension,
Despite the cast of talented actors that included Kenneth Branagh, Bill Nighy and Terence Stamp I did not find myself getting drawn in. Perhaps the director wants to show that all of them (including Tom Cruise) do not allow themselves to show emotion.
VALKYRIE is based on a true incident so at least if you don't enjoy the movie you will at least learn a wee bit of history.
Seven Pounds (12a)
This is one story that does keep you guessing right to the end. As the various strands unravel each one seems to complicate the plot even more.
Will Smith is Ben Thomas, working for the Internal Revenue Services. He has a list of folk that he has to investigate and persuade them to pay up or make some kind of arrangement to pay. He also seems to have the power to allow them to delay their payments. In the first scene he is calling 911 to report his own suicide and the entire film is shown in flashback. We see images in his mind of a road accident and learn that his wife had been killed in the crash.
He gets in touch with various clients including a young woman with a serious heart condition (Rosario Dawson) and a blind pianist (Woody Harrelson) but his purpose is not revealed until the final scenes in the movie. The other people he contacts do not seem to have anything to do with his job but as the story progresses they start to fit in.
I am not the greatest fan of Will Smith but have to admit that he is perfect in the role of Ben Thomas and strangely enough, Harrelson makes a convincing blind pianist.
If you are looking for a load of laughs this is not the film for you but I enjoyed it.
SEVEN POUNDS is directed by Gabriele Muccini.
January, 2009
Australia (12a)
Nicole Kidman stars as Lady Sarah, a young English aristocrat who in 1939, travels to her husband's cattle ranch to persuade him to sell up and come back to England. Hubby sends a cattle drover to escort her through the bush but by the time she arrives at the ranch her husband is dead, apparently killed by an Aborigine witch doctor.
At that time the Australian government's policy was to take Aborigine children away from their families and send them to a place called Mission Island to be trained as servants. Young Nullah (Brandon Walters) has escaped being sent away and when his mother is killed, Lady Sarah takes him under her wing. He has a white father and an Aborigine mother and feels he does not fit anywhere.
Sarah, Nullah and the drover, (Hugh Jackman) together with the ranch servants, undertake to drive a herd of cattle to Darwin to fulfil a government contract to supply beef to the army. Romance blooms along the way but former ranch manager and out and out baddie Neil Fletcher (David Wenham) does his best to stop the group getting to Darwin.
A lot more happens before the final scenes, including the bombardment of Darwin by Japanese planes, and the evacuation of its inhabitants under threat of invasion.
At almost 3 hours long the film has plenty of action but sometimes it seems as if too much is crammed into it and its message is confusing. If it is about the scandal of the 'Stolen Generation' of children on Mission Island there is too much of the fairy tale with scenes of Kidman singing 'Somewhere over the Rainbow.'
David Wenham is scary as the evil Neil Fletcher and young Brandon Walters is excellent as the mixed race child but Nicole Kidman just plays herself. Director Baz Lurhman has done his best to give us an epic film but it's not up there with the best of them.
Slumdog Millionaire (15)
Jamal, (Dev Patel) a young boy living in Mumbai is in the hot seat of the Who Wants to be a Millionaire Show, competing for a prize of 2,000,000 rupees. He is poor and uneducated but knows the answer to every question. The organizers suspect he is cheating and drag him off to be 'questioned' at the local police station. No one can believe he is winning by fair means but events in his past life have given him the answers to the questions.
When his mother had been killed by Hindu rioters, he and his brother Salim (Madhur Mittal) are left to live on the streets. Life seemed as if it might improve when they are taken to an orphanage but they are sent out to beg on the streets of Mumbai. Together with Latika, a young orphan girl, they run away but when the boys jump on a train going out of the city, Latika is left behind and is taken back to the orphanage.
The boys live by their wits but eventually return to Mumbai where Jamal is employed to make tea in a call centre. Salim works with a local gangster. Director, Danny Boyle's film is funny, disgusting and horrific by turns as we are taken back to Jamal's past and shown his experiences growing up in the slums of the city. Although the film has the feel-good factor it is a real eye-opener on how the other half lives.
Defiance (15)
Daniel Craig as we rarely see him, living rough in Byelorussia in 1941. DEFIANCE is the story of Jewish brothers who save almost one thousand of their fellow Jews from the gas chambers by setting up a camp in the dense forests outside the towns. They not only face problems of keeping hidden from the Russian police but eventually food shortages force them to steal from local farmers. Tuvla Bielski (Daniel Craig) sees himself as a man of principle and sets himself up as leader of the group with the sole aim of keeping the people alive. Brother Zus (Liev Schreiber) is more aggressive and wants to fight so he leaves the camp and joins with a troop of the Red Army that carries out attacks on German soldiers.
Eventually the group is forced to abandon the camp when it is bombed but apparently they continued to live in the forest for another two years.
The film is based on the true story of the brothers and those whom they helped. Tuvla and Zus survived the war and emigrated to America.
Although the movie runs for over two hours, there is plenty of action to keep you hooked until the end. Daniel Craig suits the role of Tuvla and Liev Schreiber is convincing as the brother who wants to go his own way but comes back to the family in the end.
The director is Edward Zwick.
December, 2008
Body of Lies (15)
Leonardo Di Caprio (Roger Ferris) is a CIA agent working in the Middle East, his task being to locate the leader of a group that is behind terrorist attacks and suicide bombings in Britain and Europe. His boss is Ed Hoffman (Russell Crowe) who directs operations with a detached ruthlessness that views every agent or contact as expendable.
The terrorist leader is tracked to Jordan and Di Caprio is sent there. He works with the Jordanian Secret Service, headed by Hani Salaam (Mark Strong) who promises that as long as the CIA is honest with him he will give all the help he can but Crowe insists that he be kept in the dark about his plan to draw the terrorist leader out of cover. The plan goes wrong and Di Caprio's girlfriend is kidnapped.
There is a very convoluted plot but it is fast-paced and exciting. Both Leonard Di Caprio and Russell Crowe are believable in their roles and Mark Strong is excellent as the suave but hard-as-steel Jordanian? With its CCTV secret cameras connected to satellites, the scenario evokes unease, implying that some faceless moron sitting behind a desk in an American office can control events in any part of the world.
Director Ridley Scott's film is one scary movie!
Changeling (15)
This is based on the true story of Christine Collins, an American single mother whose son is abducted from her house when she is at work. She reports his disappearance to the Los Angeles Police Department but they insist that 24 hours must elapse before he is classed as a missing person. During that time no attempt is made to look for him.
In the 1920's the LAPD was seen as corrupt but all-powerful and their refusal to look for the boy is accepted. Eventually a child is found who the Police Department declares is her son. She insists that the boy is a stranger but no one in the Department will admit that a mistake has been made. When Collins takes a stand against them, she is committed to a mental institution where other women she meets appear to be there because of conflict with the police.
The film is compelling viewing and will have you totally involved almost from the first scene and when a new development regarding missing children is revealed, the plot takes on a horrific slant.
Angelina Jolie's portrayal of Christine Collins is convincing in some ways but at other times it doesn't quite ring true.
With Clint Eastwood directing, the movie can't fail and it's well worth seeing.
The Day The Earth Stood Still (12a)
This is a remake of the 1951 film but it's difficult to see why director Scott Derrickson bothered. It's not a patch on the original. An alien being is born in a laboratory after a human-shaped figure emerges from a huge sphere that lands in Central Park. When scientists examine the fully formed adult he is found to have the same type of DNA as people on earth. Keanu Reeves plays the alien and he has been sent to destroy all human life in order to save the planet. He calls himself Klatu and insists that mankind is ruining the earth with pollution and exploitation of its natural resources.
Jennifer Connolly is one of the scientists called in by the American government to combat the 'invasion' of the giant spheres that have landed in various locations throughout the world and she befriends Klatu, taking him to meet a Nobel Prize winner (John Cleese) to try and persuade him that the world is worth saving.
This is one of those films that drags on and on and it's quite a relief when it gets to the end. None of the performances were exactly sparkling and I found it simply one long yawn.
November, 2008.
Quantum of Solace (12a)
Daniel Craig again plays Bond in a movie filled with high-speed chases, shootings and explosions - and not much else. Where is the story? In all years I've viewed James Bond's adventures, I've never once nodded off in my comfy cinema seat but I came near to it with this latest offering. Only the constant noise kept me awake.
We are treated to fantastic locations from Italy to Bolivia with Bond driving everything from his Aston Martin to a speedboat, chasing villains or being chased by them. The girls are as glamorous as ever, the baddies look suitably evil but between long, breathless, ear-splitting action scenes it all felt dull. Following on from the final events in 'Casino Royale' Bond is seeking to avenge the death of his girlfriend but is warned by 'M' (Judi Dench) to stop killing suspects and bring them in for questioning. He agrees but continues on his trigger happy way.
There is a plot of sorts. Dominic Greene (Mathieu Amalric) plans to buy up tracts of land in South America in order to control the continent's water supplies and Bond and Greene's ex-girlfriend, Camille (Olga Kyrylenko) aim to foil the plot.
We get the usual spectacular finale of 'good' versus evil so Bond fans will not be disappointed there but honestly, Daniel Craig deserves better. Director, Marc Forster take note.
Easy Virtue (PG)
This is a slick, sophisticated, tongue-in cheek look at an impoverished upper class family with not even two farthings to rub together but still clinging on to their country house and vast estate. The father (Colin Firth) is sick of it all and has virtually opted out, spending most of his time in the garden hut tinkering with an old motorbike.
Son and heir, John (Ben Barnes) comes back from Europe after sewing his wild oats (with the approval of his doting mum) but causes consternation when he turns up with a bride. Her name is Lorita. She has bleached blonde hair, is glamorous and American and makes a living riding motor-bikes. She has also been married before.
Mother (Kristen Scott Thomas) does her best to make her new daughter-in-law unwelcome, knowing that she could not fit in with the hunting, shooting, fishing set but young John is hopeful that things will work out. The situation provides laughs aplenty including a truly funny scene that involves mother's pet pooch. Noel Coward's stage play successfully adapts to the screen with its 1920 fashions and new ideas of women's roles in society. Jessica Biel shines as Lorita and Kristen Scott Thomas is perfect in the role of the snooty, sniping mother-in-law.
The director is Stephan Elliott.
Stone of Destiny (PG)
When the concept of an independent Scotland was pie in the sky and even a visit to London was a big adventure, three Glasgow University students set out to strike a blow for freedom by taking the historic Stone of Destiny back to Scotland. It was not so much a matter of stealing it but returning it to its true home. On Christmas day 1950, they succeeded in removing it from Westminster Abbey and kept it in hiding before turning themselves in.
It seemed a good idea for a film especially when three of Scotland's own movie stars - Robert Carlyle, Peter Mullan and Billy Boyd were on board. Somehow it fell flat. Perhaps the story kept too close to the real truth, more fictional incidents would have given it an edge or even a bit of humour. The characters seemed to lack depth so I couldn't get involved with them.
Sorry, but it didn't even grip me and I was looking forward to it, having been around at the time it all happened. Surely director Charles Martin Smith could have injected more drama or excitement into the story.
Burn After Reading (15)
A tale of espionage, betrayal, political intrigue, sex and violence sounds like it will make a good movie - but it is not always the case. The story begins when CIA analyst Osborne Cox (John Malkovich) is told that the US government no longer requires his services. He decides to write an explosive memoir but the resulting manuscript is tame and uninteresting. However, when his computer disc containing the first chapters of the book is found in a health club, fitness instructor Linda (Frances McDormand) sees the find as a chance to get the money for the cosmetic surgery she is convinced will change her life. Together with nutcase colleague Chad (Brad Pitt) she first tries to extort cash from Osborne Cox and when that fails, takes the disc to the Russian Embassy. Of course the information is useless to them and they throw her out.
Meanwhile CIA agent Harry (George Clooney) is bedding Osborne's wife who thinks Harry will wed her when she gets a divorce. Harry is also romancing Linda but his wife is seeing someone else. Poetic justice.
If you keep awake to the last reel the ends all get tied up but it is hard going. Having seen the trailer for the film I expected a riotous comedy but frankly found it to be complete rubbish.
Ethan and Joel Coen scripted, produced and directed the movie. They needn't have bothered.
October, 2008.
Righteous Kill (15)
Al Pacino and Robert De Niro are cops in New York when a series of killings takes place. All the victims had previously been tried for crimes and found not guilty despite evidence against them and the cops feel that justice had not been done. It now appears that a vigilante killer is meting out his own brand of justice.
Almost from the first reel, Robert de Niro appears in a black and white security video talking about the number of people he has killed since he first became a cop. Scenes from this video are shown in numerous flashbacks. When the partners are put on the case to find the killer it soon becomes apparent that the murders are being committed by a cop and De Niro falls under suspicion, especially when he is shown as having a violent temper which he finds difficult to control. The fact that two stars such as Pacino and De Niro are teamed in a film would make it seem a sure-fire success and it is dramatic in parts. However, the romance between the ageing De Niro and his much younger cop girlfriend is hard to believe.
The film’s director is Jon Avnet.
Taken (15)
Ex CIA agent Bryan Mills (Liam Neeson) moves to be near his former wife so that he can see more of the daughter he missed growing up because his ‘job’ took him away from home so much. His wife has remarried to a wealthy businessman. Daughter Kim (Maggie Grace) needs his permission to go on a trip abroad to Paris with her friend. After he had signed the paper giving his permission, he finds out that she is following a rock band to all its performance venues in Europe.
He insists she phone him every day. When the girls arrive in Paris they are kidnapped by a gang of Albanians. Neeson uses his former contacts and finds that the gang’s method is to get the girls hooked on drugs then put them to work as prostitutes. A former colleague in Paris at first agrees to help but later backs down. Neeson then finds that the man is taking bribes from the gang leaders. There follows wholesale slaughter and destruction where Neeson emerges as a ruthless killing machine, putting into use the skills he learned in his former life: torture, murder and mayhem. The trail leads to a private club where he finds his daughter being sold off to the highest bidder.
The film is gripping, jam-packed with tension and excitement, violence and blood so definitely not for the squeamish. Were I a young girl heading for Paris it might put me off.
Director Pierre Morel has a winner.
25th September, 2008.
The Duchess (12a)
Gorgiana's parents marry her off to the Duke of Devonshire (Ralph Fiennes) in what is a business transaction. If she produces an heir there is a handsome bonus for her. Gorgiana thinks the Duke has fallen in love with her but soon finds that he continues his affairs, even sleeping with the servant girls. He is not at all interested in his young bride. Gorgiana consoles herself with fashion and an interest in politics and soon becomes a popular figure in society. Eventually she gives birth to two daughters but fails to produce the son and heir.
She meets Lady Elizabeth Foster, separated from a husband who does not allow her to see her three sons. Georgiana persuades the duke to allow her friend to move in to the household but Elizabeth betrays her by sleeping with the duke. The film is based on a biography of the Duchess of Devonshire who was apparently an ancestor of Diana, Princess of Wales. It supposedly draws parallels between the lives of the two women.
The Women (12a)
Meg Ryan plays Mary Haines, who thinks her marriage is blissfully happy until she finds out that her husband is having an affair with a shop girl - not any old shop girl but Chrystal (Eve Mendez) who works at the perfume counter in upmarket New York store, Saks. Her mother advises her to do nothing in the hope the affair will die a death; her girlfriends say she should challenge the shop-girl but hang on to her man. Mary does meet Chrystal but then goes home, has a blazing row with hubby, throws him out and file for divorce. Billed as a comedy, there are some laughs but not all that many. I did enjoy the feast of fashion and the many scenes in New York's high-class shopping heaven. From the first scene it is made plain that this is a women only movie - not a man in sight but it doesn't make it a film that all women will enjoy. THE WOMEN is a remake of a 1939 movie but apparently the original had more bite. Don't expect any depth or an interesting plot but if you are looking for something light and fluffy with lots of frocks and handbags, this is for you. The director is, of course, a woman, Diane English.
September, 2008.
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (12a)
Evil Emperor Han (Jet Li) unites China and builds the Great Wall. The slaves who work on it are buried where they fall so the wall really is built on slave labour. The Emperor's one wish is to beat death and he enlists the help of a witch (Michelle Yeoh) who casts a spell that guarantees he will live forever. When he refuses to allow her to marry his chief general, she curses him, turning him to clay and he is buried in a tomb along with his soldiers and their horses - the terra cotta army. Fast forward 2000 years and the tomb is discovered.
From then on it is one long chase sequence, first through the streets of Shanghai then later into the mountains where a magic lake exists that can give eternal life. I know it sounds rubbish and it is, although there is a bit of fun along the way. Brendan Fraser plays Rick O'Connell, an archaeologist who is trying to stop the emperor reaching the lake. He is helped by wife Evelynn (Maria Bello) and son Alex (Luke Ford) in this fantasy film.
The finale has some laughs with the zombie slaves doing battle with the terra cotta warriors. Along the way Alex falls in love with the daughter of the witch, who looks well given she is 2000 years old.
Director Rob Cohen's movie tries to be a comedy but some of the time it fails to hit the mark. If you don't get to see it, you won't be missing much.
Get Smart (12a)
This is apparently an update of a 1960's American television series that sent up the secret agent films which were going around at the time. It is billed as a comedy but there really isn't very much to laugh at.
Maxwell Smart (Steve Carell) is a back room researcher for a US spy agency. He has been training as an agent forever and finally gets his chance to be a spy. He is teamed with agent 99 (Anne Hathaway) and the two set off in search of stolen uranium held in a plant somewhere in Moscow.
Director Peter Segal pulls out all the stops to try and give us laughs but rarely succeeds. Various James Bond type gadgets supposed to help our hero only get him into trouble and the hint of 'romance' between Smart and agent 99 is not believable.
'Get Smart' and give this one a miss.
August, 2008.
The Mist (15)
Film poster artist David Drayton (Thomas Jane,) his wife and son are living on the outskirts of a small town in Maine. When a violent storm breaks, they shelter in the basement but after it is over they find that a tree had come through the studio window and a neighbour's tree had demolished their boathouse. Since Drayton has previously had aggro from the lawyer neighbour, he is expecting trouble. However the neighbour's car has been wrecked so Drayton drives him in to town for supplies.
While they are in the local store a thick mist comes up and a man stumbles in to say that something in the mist has killed his friend. The shoppers keep the doors closed but a young assistant goes out and is attacked and killed by some kind of creature with huge tentacles. From then on it is a battle with various monsters and giant insects.
One of the trapped customers (Marcia Gay Harden) warns that what is happening is biblical retribution for the sinners in their midst and incites her followers to kill a young soldier when he reveals that a military blunder has allowed the monster creatures to 'cross over' from another dimension. Drayton and several others escape from the store and head away from the town only to find that the vehicle runs out of fuel before they outrun the mist. What happens next? Well, the story is based on a Steven King novella but apparently the ending has changed.
This is intended to be a scary movie but I found some of the scenes more hilarious that horrific, especially when the 'monsters' appeared. There is some element of fear but it is far outweighed by the ridiculous. Sorry, but it THE MIST is not my cup of tea.
The director is Frank Darabond
Mamma Mia (PG)
It's here at last. Every time I switched on the radio in the past few weeks, the songs from this movie were being blasted out. It was Abba music wall to wall. Meryl Streep, Pierce Brosnan and their co-stars belted out the familiar sounds and the cinema audience loved it.
The story (as if it mattered) centres on 20 year-old Sophie (Amanda Seyfried) who is about to be married but wants her dad at the wedding. The thing is, he could be any one of three men her mum had been seeing, so she invites them all. Sam (Pierce Brosnan,) Harry (Colin Firth) and Bill (Stellan Skarsgard) had all been Donna's lovers way back in the heady days of flared trousers, Mexican moustaches and Abba. Donna has brought up her daughter on her own while struggling to run a small guesthouse on the idyllic Greek Island.
The amount of hype heralding director Phillida Loyd's film ensured that it grossed an enormous fortune in the first week it was released but you won't be disappointed in it. It is out and out comedy from Brosnan's attempts at singing to Julie Walters performance as Rosie on 2" platform shoes. Don't miss it.
The X Files: I want to believe (15)
Fox Mulder (David Duchovny) got into the bad books of the FBI and has retired, passing his time cutting out newspaper clippings and calling it research. Dana Scully (Gillian Anderson) now working as a hospital doctor, is approached to see if she can bring him in to find a female FBI agent who has been kidnapped. The FBI has already enlisted the help of psychic Father Joe, (Billy Connolly) a paedophile ex priest who insists that the agent is still alive.
Mulder is prepared to believe that the man has genuine powers but Scully dislikes him on sight and is sceptical. She is caught up in her own problem, in that one of her patients is a young boy with a serious illness and the hospital authorities want to discontinue his treatment and send him to a hospice. Father Joe leads the FBI to a severed arm that has been buried under snow then later to the body of a woman but still there is no sign of the kidnapped agent. When another girl goes missing they find a link between the two abductions. Despite being complicated, the plot is gripping with lots of action and high drama, also a frisson of romance between Mulder and Scully.
The movie has a good story with plenty of suspense that will keep you intrigued right to the end. A winner for director Chris Carter.
More July Crits, 2008
Hancock (12a)
This is Clark Kent with a difference. The action hero with superhuman powers leaps in like a tornado to save lives in Los Angeles but demolishes half of the city in the process. The upshot is every one hates him but he doesn't care because he is too busy being an alcoholic slob with relationship issues. Frankly, he doesn't give a damn.
Enter advertising man Ray (Jason Bateman) who is trapped in his car on a level crossing with a train bearing down on him like a guided missile. Hancock swoops down, snatches the car and stops the train but wrecks everything else in the vicinity, including derailing every carriage of the train. Ray makes it his task to reform Hancock. He convinces him he can help present a good public image and starts off with his appearance, ditching the grungy unshaven look and fitting him out with the standard superhero uniform of black leather jumpsuit.
But when he invites him home there seems to be a strange attraction between his wife, Mary, and Hancock. As the story develops, the bond between them leads to big problems for Hancock. Despite his disagreeable personality and unsocial habits Hancock evokes sympathy and the climax of Director Peter Berg's film has an edge of seat quality. Don't miss it.
Adulthood (15)
First off this film could have done with subtitles. Being Clydeside born and bred, the dialogue was incomprehensible to me except for the four-letter word that came up in every sentence.
The story follows Sam who has just been released from prison for killing a man. He hears that someone is seeking revenge for the killing and sets out to find out who that person is. He feels that he has done his time and has already suffered beating and abuse from the other prisoners. Arriving home, he finds his mother has changed the locks and breaks in to his own house. Later, when he sees her, she tells him he has brought shame on the family.
Partly because of the 'London' accent it takes you a while to figure out the goodies and baddies and the split screen technique that shows up to four scenarios at the same time makes you wonder exactly what is happening. Half way through, the situation starts to get a bit clearer. This is a violent and brutal film but draws you in to feel empathy with the 'hero.'
Good performances from Noel Clarke who played Sam, and from Scarlett Alice Johnson as Lexi, a girl with a cocaine habit. Noel Clarke also wrote and directed the movie which eventually develops into something very watchable.
July, 2008.
Gone Baby Gone (15)
Patrick Kenzie (Casey Affleck) and Angie, his girlfriend (played by Michelle Monaghan) are private investigators working in Boston. A four-year-old girl goes missing from her home in a downmarket area of the city and her aunt calls them in to help. Kenzie thinks he has a good chance of finding her because he was brought up in the area and knows many of the small-time criminals and drug-dealers who operate there.
Police chief Doyle (Morgan Freeman,) who seems to pop up in every second movie, and Remy (Ed Harris) are also involved in the hunt for the child. The girl's mother Helene (Amy Ryan) had been running drugs for a local pusher and the trail leads to him. A deal is set up to hand over drugs money in exchange for the little girl but it all goes wrong.
When another child is abducted, a contact of Kenzie gives him information on wanted paedophiles that leads to the house where the boy is being held. The plot is so complex that it sometimes feels as if the audience has missed something but by the end of the film events are explained - perhaps tied up too neatly.
There are many violence scenes and a great deal of choice language but the story is intriguing and the characters believable especially Amy Ryan and Casey Affleck.
Ben Affleck directs his brother in this movie.
Wanted (18)
It is the old story of the main character being bullied and put upon by everyone; even his girlfriend is having sex with his best friend. Wesley (James McAvoy) works as an accountant, his job is boring and he is the target of his boss's spitefulness. He had never known his father but one day gun-toting Angelina Jolie arrives to tell him that his father had been a member of an ancient cult known as the Fraternity of Assassins, and has been killed. Wesley is to take his place and execute his father's killer. Echoes of the old westerns here as he goes after the man who shot his paw.
After going through bizarre training rituals and obviously a personality transplant he carries out his first kill and it seems he is accepted into the Fraternity. However, all is not as it appears and it takes another hour of fast action stunts to reveal the real reason he has been recruited.
If fantasy stories are your thing you will love this film based on comic book characters, otherwise it is one long car chase, impossible feats and superhuman exploits. Total rubbish but good fun The director is Timur Bekmambetov.
June, 2008
Sex and the City (15)
I suppose if you were hooked on the TV series, this film will seem wonderful. Never having watched the girls, I found it confusing at first but fun. However, after the first hour I found myself yawning and looking at my watch. The four have moved on from sharing a flat and gone their own ways, but each has some kind of problem in her life.
Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) is a successful author, has settled down with her Mr Big but thinks it would be a good idea to get married. He agrees but the wedding spirals into a massive event, causing trouble between them.
Charlotte (Kristin Davis) and her husband have adopted a girl and she says she is 'happy every day' but she secretly yearns for a baby of her own. Miranda (Cynthia Dixon) is so busy with her work as a lawyer and looking after her son, she doesn't have time for sex with her husband and he strays. Samantha (Kim Cattrall) has gone off to Hollywood and settled down with her actor boyfriend but is utterly bored with the relationship. She is more in love with New York than with him and goes back there every chance she gets, also with her fiftieth birthday looming she thinks there should be more to life.
After an extremely long movie the four friends find the answers they were looking for but by that time half the audience couldn't care less. As expected, there is plenty of bare scud and bonking on screen, plus a fair bit of humour but it left me cold. What did impress me were the fabulous fashions.
The movie is directed by Michael Patrick King.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (12a)
It is the mid fifties, and Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) with his buddy Mac (Ray Winstone) are captured by Russians and taken to a secret atomic weapons testing base in the Nevada desert. They are forced to locate a mystery box that is stored there. It contains something with strong magnetic powers but Indie doesn't know its significance. After causing havoc he escapes and settles back to his job as a professor of archaeology but his pursuers, led by a woman with an odd accent (Cate Blanchett) are still after him.
He meets biker Mutt (Shia LeBeouf) who tells him that former colleague (John Hurt) and is being held prisoner in South America. When he tracks him down he also finds former girlfriend Marion (Karen Allen.) From clues written on a cave wall they learn the existence of a peculiarly shaped skull and set off to find it.
From causing mayhem on a motorbike to mad pursuits at breakneck speeds on jungle tracks, from careering down the Amazon falls to white river rafting on a floating jeep, our hero hardly gets a minute to collect his pension. There is the expected collapsing temple, the city of gold, even the appearance of the un-dead, and Indie deals with them all in his usual daring and fearless fashion. Critics may mock the return of the old-fashioned adventure stories but can't deny that the audience is gripped by them. With the introduction of young sidekick Mutt Williams, is there a hint that the famous sweat-stained fedora hat may find a new owner?
Despite the rubbish convoluted plot and (sometimes laughable) special effects, Steven Spielberg has once again directed a success.
May, 2008.
21 (12a)
Jim Sturgess (Ben Campbell) is a wizard with figures but his big ambition is to study medicine at Harvard. He is thrilled to be accepted for the course but there is one big problem - the course fees. He works part-time in a men's outfitters but there is no chance of him being able to save up the amount of money needed for his degree. When Professor Micky Rosa (Kevin Spacey) who runs a blackjack club at the college offers him the chance to be part of a group that goes to Las Vegas at weekends to gamble at the tables, he jumps at it. The system is based on counting cards. Sturgess is determined he will only continue with the gambling system until he makes enough money to pay his university fees. Despite being instructed not to continue playing after being signalled to stop he goes on and loses a vast amount of money. The group falls out and the professor abandons the project. However by this time Jim is hooked on gambling and persuades the others to continue. He is caught and beaten up by the security team at the casino and that is the end of it all. But is it?The film is directed by Robert Luketic
Flashbacks of a Fool (15)
Daniel Craig is Joe Scott, an ageing film star who is apparently steeped in decadence, from indulging in threesomes in bed to snorting coke and anything else he can access. When his casting director fails to offer him a part and his agent sacks him, he is depressed. To cap it all, his mother phones to tell him that his boyhood best friend has died. He decides to end it all. We see him walking in to the sea and that seems to be that.
They say that everyone's life flashes before them when they are dying and his mind goes back to when he was a young boy living with his family in a seaside town.
A married neighbour seduces him and while they are making love a tragedy occurs. Feeling guilty about what had happened he runs away from home to make a career as an actor in Hollywood. Surviving the suicide attempt he returns home to his family in England and tries to heal old wounds.
Don't expect an action movie from the new James Bond. I've not seen such a slow and dreary story for a long time but director Baillie Walsh's film might appeal to some people.
Made of Honour (12a)
Tom and Hannah have been friends for over ten years but it is only when she asks him to be maid of honour at her wedding that he realizes he is in love with her. She works for an art gallery and on a buying trip to Scotland she had fallen for Colin, a rich Scottish duke.
Accepting that she has found the love of her life, Tom agrees to carry out the duties of chief bridesmaid, including setting up her wedding shower and helping to pick the lingerie she will wear on her wedding night. Director Paul Weiland must have had a lot of fun sending up the so-called customs and traditions of Scotland and the lifestyle of an upper class family. I hope American filmgoers don't think we all carry on like that.
As in all romantic comedies, despite the barriers to true romance, the right folk end up with each other in the end.
Patrick Dempsey is excellent as Tom and Mitchelle Monaghan is suitably sweet and vacuous as Hannah and we did get a chance to see some real Scottish actors for a change. However, Kevin McKidd as Colin never got a chance to develop the character and could have been replaced by a cardboard cut out. The audience would not have noticed the difference.
April, 2008
Vantage Point (12a)
The format is that an incident is seen from several viewpoints and initially the story is confusing with the same scene being re-enacted at least half a dozen times then stopping at one particular point, the cliff-hanger. What happens next?
The movie begins in the newsroom of a television studio where Sigourney Weaver is the controller, directing cameramen and reporters who are covering the American President's visit to the Spanish town of Salamanca. Dennis Quaid is Thomas Burns, a presidential bodyguard, newly returned to his job after taking a bullet for his boss in a previous assassination attempt. His nervousness makes him especially vigilant but he still fails to anticipate another attempt that sees the president being shot in the chest. William Hurt plays the president.
Other viewpoints include that of a tourist, a Spanish undercover policeman and the terrorists.
The action is fast-paced and dramatic culminating in an exciting car chase that finally provides all the answers and ties up the loose ends. What is especially frightening is that the movie illustrates how modern technology can be used in acts of terrorism.
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Comments
Amanda Wheeler | Tue Apr 22 2008
marion | Sat Oct 04 2008